Are you excited??

Perhaps it was the mood she caught me in. Perhaps I was in the same mood when others asked me the same question.

That seems to be the most common question: are you excited. And other forms: are you getting excited? Are you nervous/anxious? Are you ready for the wedding/big day? Do you have everything done for the wedding?

As a bride, are you supposed to feel excited? I would assume so since that's the most common question I get. Except, it's not often I feel that way.

I'm pretty honest with people and usually answer with something like, "Eh." lol That's Nicole for ya. I started to think something was wrong with me because I just don't feel...giddy about it. And I thought about just coming up with something to say to people like, "Oh my goodness you have no idea!" because when I'm honest, I sound like I'm really not looking forward to it or too stressed out to enjoy the process.

Why am I not excited? I've tried to figure it out. Do I have too much on my mind to feel anything, let alone excited? Am I so even-keeled that I'm really not "excited"? Has it not hit me yet? Am I actually kind of dreading it because much attention will be on me (not something I look forward to--I'd rather just sit in a corner I think)? Is it because we'll be legally married some other time & this is just show? Is it because we already live together?

And then I figured it out. I do get excited. I just don't remain excited. It comes and goes. And usually it's regarding one specific thing. Are you excited about your groom's cake? Super duper excited! Are you excited about the drink luge? I wish I could see it now! Are you excited about getting married before the ceremony? Completely. Are you excited to walk down the aisle with your dad? I plan on sobbing before the wedding so I use up my supply!

I thought I was crazy until I came across this lovely post from Offbeat Bride. And I realized that I don't need to be excited, nervous, anxious, or any other word you can think of to describe a bride and what she may or may not be feeling. I don't have to feel excited 24 hours a day. I can be whatever I want to be and however I want to feel.